First things first, this quiet Saturday morning...
HOW 'BOUT THEM SHOCKERS & JAYHAWKS?!?!?!?!
Okay, now that's out of the way so I can move on. :)
Not much happening today. A little cleaning...maybe. And lots of time with the kids...thankfully. Aren't your own babies just awesome? I mean, other kids are great, too...but there's just something about your own...
They're smart. They're silly. They're compassionate. They're intuitive. They're trying, yet satisfying. Love my Maya and my Gus. Maya, more-so than Gabriel, has been very aware of the emotions running in overdrive these past 2 weeks. She is so strong. A 4-year-old who comforts her sad mama and tends to her little brother. I don't know what she is going to be when she grows up, but I guarantee it will change this world. Andy my sweet Gabriel...he is just my precious little dude who has been a great distraction for the family, especially his Papa. :)
The day Grandma died, I came home from the hospital, and Sam told me I needed to tell the kids. So I went into the bedroom and explained to them that GGV had gone to Heaven to live with Jesus so they wouldn't be seeing her anymore at her house or at Papa's house or at church. Gabriel just repeatedly asked, "GGV went to Heaven?" His little mind couldn't quite grasp the concept. And Maya, without skipping a beat said, "but Mommy...that's okay because GGV isn't sick anymore." She immediately took on the role of a comforter. Just amazes me.
The day before the funeral, we were driving around in town, and Maya just busted out in tears. I was afraid maybe she had pinched her hand in the car seat or something...I kept asking her, "Maya, what's wrong? Why are you crying? What hurts?" And through her tears and brokenness, she said, "Mommy, I just miss GGV so much. I want to go see her." 4 years old. And she got it. I debated at that moment whether I should let Maya see her one last time, either by taking her to the funeral home or taking her to the funeral itself, as a means of closure, which is something we all need. However, I just couldn't bring myself to do it. For one, Maya carries the sadness that she sees her Mama carry...I did not want to put that on her--I wasn't quite holding myself together at that point. But more importantly, the last time Maya saw GGV, she was sitting up in her hospital bed, laughing and playing, and that's how I want Maya to remember her. And who knows, maybe Maya won't remember anything at all; but at least if she does, it will be pleasant.
I hated to hear her cry that day, knowing all too well the sadness she felt of missing her GGV. But once again, it was a confirmation of the special relationship she had with her great-grandma. And for that, I'm so thankful. Maya will have her GGV right in her heart, just like the rest of us. And, she will follow in those same footsteps that Grandma planted for me...not just to go to church, but to be involved...to be in Sunday School...to lead Missions...to be Women's Ministry President...and to have a beautiful relationship with Christ. Our path has been made. All we have to do is follow. And if we follow, we will have one rockin' reunion!
xoxo,
Sarah
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