Thankful Thursday

(Warning: this could be a long one.)

Today I'm thankful for reminders. I have to admit that my memory has abandoned me on more than one occasion. Lately, it's bothered me more than ever because rather than just chalking it up to "one of those things that just happens sometimes," I've been hearing my grandmother's voice say, "Uh huh...you just wait, Sarah. It will happen to you someday."

Those days are arriving. Closer together. lol

Anyway, I got an email from a friend this week, and it reminded me of a conversation that Sam and I have had on more than one occasion. One of us will ask, "Well, do you think we should invite them over for dinner?" Then the other one says, "Hmmm...I dunno if they're good for that type of company." We may fuss back and forth for a few short minutes, and before long, the conversation is nothing but history.

In the email, my friend brought up a question that I have mulled over in my head more times than I can count -- 'As Christians and/or good people, aren't we supposed to still be friends and influence the negative people, as well?'

The email brought up some of these awesome quotes -- check these out:

"If people were always kind and obedient to those who are cruel and unjust, the wicked people would have it all their own way: they would never feel afraid, and so they would never alter, but would grow worse and worse." Charlotte Bronte, 1816-1855 

"If an idiot were to tell you the same story every day for a year, you would end by believing it." Horace Mann, 1796-1859

"The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it." Henry David Thoreau

"If your ship is sinking, it might be a good time to throw out the stuff that's been weighing it down. Let go of those who bring you down and surround yourself with those who bring out the best in you." Unknown

But this was the part that I reeeeeeeally liked in the email. You ready? Listen to this.

As you get to know someone, ask yourself every so often: 'Is THAT who I want to be, and is the way they are how I want to become?' If YES, nurture and build that friendship. If NO, learn a vital lesson: you can be friendly with just about anyone. As much as it depends on you, live at peace with everybody. But reserve very few slots in your life for real friends, close friends. The closer you allow them to get, and the more you let them know you, the more influence they will have on how you think, how you are and what you do. You don't owe just anybody the freedom to get close to you -- nor do you need to be BFF with them to be friendly and cordial with them.

Most of the time, the best people in your life don't advertise. You need to be hunting for them.  Those who loudly, rudely demand your attention don't have it coming. Sure, be friendly toward them. But understand that their idea of friendship is for you to give them whatever they want, bend their direction, agree with their ideas, teachings and decisions and run around after them. That's not friendship. Autocracy or despotism, maybe. But certainly not friendship.

Some of those people who seek attention and popularity will eventually get real and need someone around them whom they know were cordial but held to their own standards and were willing to be men and/or women of principle, not bending to everyone else's whims just to be noticed or liked. They'll look your way if you've earned a second glance.

Others won't. Hear this. Others will not, and will accuse you of being unfriendly with them. Nothing to be done about that. You're already not orbiting anywhere close to their gravity, so just leave them alone. Their repeated attempts to discredit you will only come back on them. Pray for them, care about what happens to them - but leave them alone.

When you have all the 'right' answers, you'll find no one really wants to ask you anything. No one cares about your hope. Words and lectures don't display hope; living a full life, packed down, shaken together, overflowing, that sees Jesus in unlikely people; living each day looking for Jesus in others and in yourself, living to bring out the best in others, living to put in a good word for Jesus, living to inspire second looks and serious questions - THAT is a life of hope. It's a life that generates questions like, "Where does that come from? How do you keep going? What do you get out of that?" And better yet - "How do I get what you've got?"

Today, I'm thankful for my real, close friends.

What are you thankful for?

~Sarah