Nothing Short of a Miracle.

Many people are sick to their stomachs and heartbroken this morning. The words won't come. The tears won't stop. Nothing feels right. Nothing.

Not only is this very precious family grieving, but also are a thousand others, some of whom are complete strangers that have never even met Paxten's parents. Some of us are nothing more than mere acquaintances, yet we feel so close just following along their journey in writing and photographs. Paxten was a powerful little girl, and she continues to be a powerful little spirit. (I love both of my friends, Lindseys' writings at http://www.welcomethechild.blogspot.com/ and http://www.mamalovestyle.blogspot.com/ )

We begged God to grant Paxten a miracle. Many of us have been on our knees, even on our faces, before the throne of God, asking, begging, sobbing, even yelling for healing. I know last Thursday, by 11:00 p.m., I was physically exhausted and mentally drained from prayer. Yes, prayer! So, what happened?

In our minds, miracles are supposed to be like an eleventh-hour reprieve. But God's definition is obviously different. While Webster calls it, "an extraordinary event in the PHYSICAL world that surpasses all known human or natural powers and is ascribed to a supernatural cause," I believe they happen in the spiritual world, too. Often times, miracles are masked by the circumstances surrounding them. But they are there.

Paxten's miracle is one of those. Awesome, Christian parents. An angelic little girl. Only 22 months old. And she had to fight for 13 of those months. A horrific, devastating, grueling, cruel fight. Nonetheless, the miracle was there. Did you see it? It doesn't require a professional eye. Only open minds and open hearts. Jesus healed her last night -- not in the accustomed, mankind concept of healing, but in the extraordinary, supernatural, TOTAL and COMPLETE kind of healing! For me, this experience makes me want to love and serve my Jesus so much more. I want to secure my spot in Heaven so I can meet all of the Christians and Kyries and Paxtens Up There, not to mention seeing my own sweet GGV who I miss dearly!

While I absolutely cannot even begin to fathom what it feels like to lose a child, I am familiar with saying goodbye to someone I love with all my heart. AND, just the way I believe that rain is wet and a blue sky is behind every cloud, I KNOW that God is real. I KNOW that what the Bible says about Heaven is true. With that said, our top prayer, our best-of-the-best, cream-of-the-crop, ANSWERED prayer is Heaven!

It is okay for us to break and grieve and lament and weep. But, we must not lose hope. Little Paxten had pain here -- the needles, the tubes, the fevers, the vomiting, the mouth sores, the discomfort...you name it. She has no pain There. Little Paxten struggled here. There are no struggles There. Our minds may not grasp the reality, but it is no question why God took her Home last night. Even Paxten understands. And she is, at this very moment, at peace in the presence of Jesus.

Thank you, Jesus!!!

~S

Thankful Thursday

Today I'm thankful for surgeons.

I'm thankful I have only had two surgeries in my life (wisdom teeth & gall bladder extractions).

I am especially thankful to have an uncle and a cousin whose professions allow them to be involved in various surgeries and establish good relationships with the doctors. As a result, we are spoiled with top-notch recommendations of "the best" surgeons and anesthesiologists. Once the dr. discovers exactly who we're related to, there are many laughs...and commendations. I'm proud of my uncle & my cousin...and I'm thankful for the many jobs well done over the years that have brought the rest of us familiarity and calmness by the simple mention of a name.

There is a certain amount of peace that comes with knowing you are in good hands.

What are you thankful for, today?

<3 P4P <3,
S

Get Ready.

The Autism CAREWalk. It's coming. April 14, 2012. Are you ready -- to walk -- to donate -- to help me help Dom?

I knew yesterday was going to be a tough day for the little red-headed bug when I walked up to Mom's house, and I wasn't greeted with a big smile at the door. Instead, I was greeted by Mom keeping guard at the door, greeting me with a fair warning that he was having a ROUGH morning. I greeted him in my usual manner, rubbing his bony little back and saying, "Good morning, Lovey!!!" He informed me in no time that he was NOT in the mood to visit with a few sharp screams and some swift kicks to Nana's shins. (Poor Nan. lol)

When Dad and I left for work, we were both worried about what kind of day Dom would have at school. So, we did what we always do when he's having a rough morning...we whisper our own little prayers, cross our fingers, go to work, and hope for the best. That's all we can do.

As expected, Dom's report for the day wasn't pleasant. The teacher made a comment that he was "defiant." Here is why (and this is the part that makes us -- his family, his voice, his advocates -- want to belt out some sharp screams and a few swift kicks to the teacher's shins):

The class was instructed to color a picture of the Kansas State Seal. Dominic refused. When the teacher physically held the crayon in his hand and guided his hand to color, he refused again and began screaming. And by that scenario, he is labeled "defiant." REALLY?!

And here is where our frustration lies...

First of all, when Dominic screams, he is trying to communicate. He is trying to say, "That hurts me." "I don't like that." "I need help." "I --- ." You name it.

Secondly, there are some things that Dom just absolutely cannot bring himself to touch, smell, or taste. A crayon is one of those things. So naturally, the above scenario sent him into meltdown mode. The teacher failed to pick up on it. Again.

It has come to the time where enough is enough. I'm glad that God blessed Dom with a mama who can be a pitbull when necessary. So, she's pulling out the "big guns" and taking her concerns to the top. Please pray for her and for Dom as they continue to search for help and find an educational setting where he can be successful.

The Autism CAREWalk. It's coming soon. Get ready.

Big Love,

Sarah

Love My O.P.I

Maya and I spent our Saturday playing in nail polish...it was SO. MUCH. FUN.

I LOVE having a little girl. And, of course, I LOVE having my little boy right in the middle of all of it, too. He is finally past the stage of constantly begging me to paint his nail, too. But he still likes to watch and hand over whatever color we request. ;)

And, special thanks to Grady for picking out some FAB colors!

All Lacquered Up,
Sarah

This Is Why.

Occasionally, people -- including our own family -- will scoff or ridicule our methods of protecting Dominic. (Obviously, his mama calls the shots, but I use the term "our" because we have all learned together -- Steph, Mike, Mom, Dad, Sam, & myself. We all have to be on the same page when it comes to his protection and well being.)

We have heard so many jabs. Most times it's easy to ignore them, but others really just make me want to stomp and snort and shout, "Do you SERIOUSLY think we do this out of pleasure?! Do you think we're THAT stupid?! Do you think we haven't already tried this before and learned the HARD way that it DOESN'T WORK?!"

"Why can't she just let him be a kid?"


"Oh, brother, just let him have fun. He can't hurt anything here." Maybe not, but he can hurt himself.

"Just let him taste it...you never know, he might like it." And literally five seconds later, we are cleaning up puke in addition to stripping him down, giving him a bath, and changing his clothes.

Or, here's one of my personal favorites: *whispered* "Oh, she uses a leash...why would you treat your child like a dog?" For one, he isn't treated like an animal, but if that's the way you see it, fine. However, until you are the person running after him and rolling yourself up in a knot after hitting the pavement to save him from being hit by an oncoming car, I'd keep that advice to yourself.

Our hearts will always be worried about our funny, loving red-head. Always.

This is why: CLICK HERE.

Autism ~ Support, Educate, Advocate, LOVE.
Sarah

Seriously?

I'm sure all of you know how completely sickened I am by feathered, winged, egg-laying creatures. Really. The very thought of these bipeds send me over the edge, causing anyone within a 2-mile radius to experience the sound of a disturbing, shrilling scream and anyone within sight to witness me having convulsive fits, followed by a raw throat & hoarse voice. Sam was lucky enough to witness the convulsions this morning when he showed me CHICKENS strutting through our back yard. *shiver*

I know, right? How does that happen? That's all I can say right now, or I'm going to puke. I have no idea why...where...who...

I would MUCH rather have a cow in my front yard than chickens in the back. :)
(Click here for that post.)

In case you're wondering, I do NOT visit the jungle or the Austrailian Outback at the zoo. *shiver*

S

Do Good.

Howdy, everyone! Hope this post finds your weekend off to a great start. I must admit that it was a LOOOONNNNGGGGG week! Yet, I know that it seemed so much longer for others.

This life-changing event with the Pearsons has just melted me, and I can't get away from it. I was sick. I had a migraine. I couldn't sleep. And you know what's funny? I couldn't stop praying. It's like I would finish a prayer for her...and I wasn't done. I would wake up at 1:15 and think to myself, "I wonder if Blake & Libby are getting any rest?" I'd wake up again around 1:45 and I would text Sam, "Ugh...I can't sleep." I'd be up again by 2:30...and so I'd pray. And again at 3:30, then at 5:00...and all I could do was pray. I keep a pretty big prayer list, in addition to petitions on behalf of my own family. And usually, after I send Up my needs to Jesus, I'm able to leave them There and wait for His answer. But I couldn't get this family off of my heart. I still can't. I feel like she's a part of us, somehow...or that I've known her mama & daddy for a long time (which I have, but it's not like our relationship goes beyond a mere acquaintance). I've never even seen this baby aside from one time of bumping into her with her mommy & daddy at the grocery store. It's just bizarre how this whole thing has completely drained me...and I'm not even a sister or an aunt or a grandma or a close friend. I can't imagine what it's done to those who are.

I know many of you are feeling the exact same way. I've had text after text after text. "Have you read an update yet?" "Sarah, I want to do something. What can I do?" "I feel sick...there has to be something we can do to help." And, as simple as it may seem, the only answer I can give is, "Just pray. Just fall on your face before Him. Cry. Scream. Beg. Plead. And when you're finished...do it again." I've been asking myself the exact same question and giving myself the exact same answer. And, I think every single pair of pants I wore this week now have smoking holes in the knees...but I still wanted to do more. I still wanted to take action and do something. I think it's just a natural tendency of mine. So along with praying for comfort and peace and healing, I began asking God to show me what I could DO for Blake, Libby and Paxten. And, as always, He was faithful to show me.

This morning I was working on my school assignment and Maya asked for a drink. Of course, I gave her my "give me a second, honey" answer. After the 3rd time she asked, God gently nudged me and said, "Pssst...Libby would probably love to get a drink for Paxten." That was it. I didn't need to hear anymore. I shut my laptop, and I got Maya a drink...for Blake, Libby, & Paxten. I spent time playing in the floor with my sweet babies...for Blake, Libby, & Paxten. I went to my mom's house and basked in the warmth of spending time with my parents, sister, niece, & nephew...for the Teschkes & Pearsons. I spent less time griping about toys on the floor, knots tied in my shoestrings, and shrilling screams of excitement. I spent more time playing on the floor...laughing along with the silliness of Spongebob...enjoying the company of friends...giving tight hugs...giving butterfly kisses...for Blake, Libby, & Paxten.

For those of you who have asked, just do good. And, spend more time with Jesus. I'm sure Pax, her mama, and her daddy would tell you the same.

Keep praying, keep believing.
Sarah